What to Pray for Your Wife

Two weeks ago I had coffee with an older married friend to talk about how to care for my wife. One of the questions I asked him was, “ Over the last 25 or so years what difference has prayer made? What do you pray for your wife?”   What he shared with me was too good to keep to myself; he told me that he has this bookmark with certain things he prays for his wife. Later that week he gave me a photocopy of the bookmark. Here is what is on it:

  • That she will know Your will for her life, pleasing You in all respects and bearing fruit in every good work (col 1:9-10).
  • That her physical Health will be strong and her stamina high (Isaiah 40:28-31).
  • That You will release her from worry or guilt over things she is not responsible for or in control of (Matthew 6:25-34, Luke 12:22-32).
  • That a godly mentor would come into her life (Titus 2:3-5).
  • That she will not gossip or keep company with those who do (Proverbs 20:19, 1st Timothy 3:11).
  • That you will give her discernment and wisdom and protect her from those who would deceive her (1st timothy 2:14, James 1:5-8).

and following Jesus’ Pattern of Pray found in John 17:

  • God would be glorified in and through her life.
  • She would know God and grow in the knowledge and experience of Him.
  • God would keep her safe in Him. (Protect her from despair, discouragement and a lack of faith in the midst of trials.)
  • She would be morally pure and set apart for His service.
  • She would be one with God, her husband and with women in the body of Christ.
  • She would be faithful to Christ to the end.

Additionally, I would like to commend one more resource to you in this area.  There is a book called  Water of the Word: Intercession for Her, by Andrew Case. Here is an example of the prayers found in it

My Gracious Master,

Cause my delightful wife to work out her own salvation with fear and trembling, knowing all the while that it is You who work in her, both to will and to work for Your good pleasure.

May she rejoice in You always, and let her reasonableness be known to everyone. Please let her not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving may she make known her requests to You. And all this so that Your peace, which surpasses all understanding, will guard her precious heart and mind in Christ Jesus.

Finally Father, make her think on whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, on anything of excellence, and anything worthy of praise. Through Your Son and for Your glory I ask these things. Amen (Philippians 2 & 4).
Click here to purchase it.

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  1. Brethren, before posting this comment I once again read through your ‘rules for commenting’ lest I should offend or stumble a weaker brother or worse still write something that is dishonoring to God and defiling to the brethren. But even now if you feel that this post is not comely or edifying, then please feel free to delete it. No offense taken whatsoever.

    Without beating around the bush, I shall get directly to the point. In all our praying for our wives, should we not pray that they would (in submission to the Scriptures and the Spirit) be faithful to the ‘duty of sex’?
    Agreed, that the primary goal of Christian married couples coming together sexually is procreation [Malachi 2:15]. But the Apostle exhorts the unmarried and even the widows that if they cannot contain they should marry. And he gives the reason why – ‘for it is better to marry than to burn’! [1Cor 7:8, 9]. In another place he says, ‘to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband’. [1Cor 7;2].

    As a preacher, I have counseled many married men, and except for very few exceptions the lament of most of them is; that after the initial zeal of the marriage wears off and especially after the couple has been blessed with two or more children, the wife looses all interest in sex and if at all engages in it does so drudgingly.

    It was not until I was a few years into my own marriage that I began to understand the Apostles admonition in Colossians 3:19. There he says, “Husbands love your wives, and be not bitter against them”. It is indeed easy for a husband to become bitter against an unyielding wife. And what is worse, this opens a door for the devil to come in with all his wiles. [see 1Cor 7:5]

    The wise man in the Proverbs writes, “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger? [Prov 5:18-20]. What becomes of the man who does not find fulfillment with his wife is clearly implied in the above scripture!

    Beloved this is a serious issue. I have spoken to many a true child of God who became a victim to sexual sin because of this. Yes it is good for a man not to touch a woman, but not all men have this gift [1Cor 7:1 & 7]. Many a godly man has begun coveting his neighbors’ wife, fallen into pornography, fornicated and in some cases has even suffered a divorce because of an unyielding wife!
    So the subject at hand is indeed a serious one and not one that can be swept under the carpet or one that deserves an ostrich syndrome.

    The need for sex is a real one, and when one cannot find it within the marriage bond, one makes himself an easy prey for the wiles of the devil!

    So in all our praying for our wives (or husbands, as the case may be [see 1Cor7:4, 5]) let us fervently pray that they will be faithful to the ‘duty of sex’!

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